Cosmogony 553: Grulos Jandy

In 2420 Grulos Jandy began a series of experiments aimed at limiting the side effects caused by long interstellar hyperjumps (jumps with a distance greater than 10 parsecs). Jandy’s experiments were known for their thoroughness and ethical neutrality: he experimented on everything, from mice to men. He even made men eat mice. Jandy ultimately determined that longer hyperjumps could be accomplished with fitter personnel, so he formulated the grueling Jandy exercise regime. Combining pilates, yoga and tools used by the Spanish Inquisition, Jandy’s regime produced astronauts capable of jumping a further 5 parsecs. Controlled jumps of 15 parsecs opened a whole new interstellar neighbourhood to curious humanity, or at least to those who were curious and also supremely fit. Ultimately, Jandy will be remembered for his hard hitting experimentation. He lost all control of himself in his later years, exploiting his high-standing to satisfy his sadistic cravings.

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